Big or small, sex parties have been a part of Gay culture since the beginning of time. Men gather at bathhouses, empty warehouses, public parks, homes and apartments in hopes to partake in anonymous sex with other men. Some have thought that, with the popularity of such sites as Adam4adam.com (A4A) and Bgclive.com (Black Gay Chat or BGC) (online dating sites for gay men), the day of bathhouses or similar venues were a thing of the past. However, most major cities around the World still have bathhouses that boast steady attendance, especially around certain holidays and (of course) Gay pride events. Although homosexuality has become more ‘mainstream’ in recent years, there also still remains a number of ‘Down-Low’ or closeted Gay men that find it easier and/or more secure to have sex at parties instead of their own homes or those of other individuals.
Among the Gay Black community, private sex parties and clubs have become increasingly popular around the country. Some are more organized functions that happen on a regular basis or pop up around holidays (Pride, Memorial Day or MLK weekend for example), often organized and hosted by a small number of people. These events can be held at loft spaces, apartments, warehouses…you name it! Utilizing A4A and BGC, these organizers advertise their parties to specific niches (Fit, muscular, masculine ONLY) or cast a broader net by inviting anyone who is interested. Some party hosts will claim that they have a ‘strict door or policy’ regarding a guy’s appearance, as to stave off undesired guests (No fats, ‘fems’, over 40…etc.). There is usually a cover charged involved at more organized sex parties. They often advertise free drinks, condoms and lube and sometimes even a designated smoking area. If you have something glamorous in mind, perhaps that is the wrong image in mind. This can, of course, vary from party to party, but most of theses functions are the definition of “make-shift”; a mattress or two thrown on the ground (with a sheet at least), perhaps a couch or two and maybe a chair or stool here or there. However, the spaces serve their intended purpose; a place for men to gather together and fuck…with infrequently ‘chill’ as well. 
Far less organized and far more exclusive are small intimate sex parties or freak groups or any combination of those (based on who you ask). It would seem that a more selective person (with the proper space) opts to host a smaller group sex party. Sometimes, it can a greedy person who decides to throw their own function. A Bottom (receptive anal sex partner – for those who don’t know where they are) may want only Tops (the insert-er) coming to their function; Google ‘cum dump’ if you’re curious. Small sex parties frequently happen in hotel rooms. The host could be a visitor(s) who are stopping through for a holiday weekend or for business, or a local who would not have the space or privacy at any other time. Regardless of the circumstance, small freak parties are usually far more random and spur of the moment than more organized weekly gatherings.
There is a lot of stigma surrounding sex parties in the Gay Black Community. Of course, there is always the real threat of transmitting diseases during sexual encounters with another person and some of these events promote unprotected, raw or bareback sex. However, for as many parties that advertise unprotected acts, there are many more who promote being safe and offer condoms upon arrival and throughout their spaces. People sometimes still choose to have raw sex even if condoms are provided. The hope that we share here at Blackuality.Com is that people would be proactive about their sexual health by being regularly screened and tested for Sexual-transmitted infections. Sex parties can be thought of with a certain level of shame because of the risk of disease in having anonymous sex. However, there is also a level of curiosity and willingness to go and ‘try it one day’. It is this same curiosity that causes these parties to fill up with dozens (or far more) of men after a night of drinking at a club/bar. If sex parties didn’t server a purpose, they simply would not exist.
If sex parties or bathhouses are your thing, then more power to you and if you’ve never been, but are curious to try one out…why not? No one can force you to do anything you don’t want to do (which is usually strictly the case and is definitely enforced across the board). The worse that could happen is that you’ll be out of a few dollars. Look at this way, you could be supporting a Black-owned business if you go.
Let us know what you think. Maybe we will comprise a list of parties to go to in the future if you all are interested. Take our poll and leave us some comments!
What is your take on Sex Parties and Bathhouses?
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